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Feeling alive

in Random Musings

Photo by african_fi on

Sometimes what I need is a reminder that I’m alive.

I need to feel, sense, smell, and taste life. I need to breathe fresh air. I need to feel the sun on my skin. I need to sweat.

For different people, that sense of being alive comes in different forms. Some women feel most alive when they are holding a new baby or making a meal. That is not me. My sense of life comes with adrenaline rushes like hitting a heavy bag, riding a bike, going on a hike, or doing something adventurous.

The only time I get that feeling while sitting still is when I am writing something I am passionate about. My adrenaline gets pumping and my fingers can’t keep up with my imagination.

I need that kind of rush in my life. As my oldest child celebrated her 8th birthday this weekend, it hit me again just how much I am going to have to pursue those bouts of adrenaline to continue to feel young.

I am in better physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional condition now than I was at 20, but I know that I am going to have to continue to challenge myself to stay this way.

Several of my friends stay on their targets by running races. I’ve tried running, but it really didn’t do it for me. I do it as exercise, but it isn’t a passion.

When I was in college, I took a self defense class and I loved the adrenaline rush of literally flipping a man over my head. That kind of physical power is intoxicating.

The closest physical activity I’ve found to the rush I’m looking for is when I am beating my punching bag. I’ve had a yearning to train for a real sparring match since my teens, but I’ve always felt like I’d be judged for it. Ladies aren’t supposed to do things like that. The more comfortable I have come with my own skin and who I am though, I think I am ready to tackle this next big adventure.

I don’t know how to start other than changing my workout to a video training program, so I guess I will start there. I don’t know that I will ever give myself permission to get in a ring because it would be a hard thing to explain to my kids, but I think I would love the experience.

What do you do to feel alive? What keeps you motivated to get up in the morning? What is YOUR adrenaline rush?

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